If you're the one driving your mom to appointments, picking up your dad's prescriptions, or fielding calls from three different doctors' offices, you're carrying a second household in your head on top of your own.
I was an ICU nurse before I did this. One of the first things any care team asks is what medications someone takes, and it's one of the hardest questions for a family to answer on the spot. You shouldn't have to answer it from memory. You should be able to hand someone a page.
Here's what goes on it.
Page 1: the medication list
One line for every medication, including the ones that don't need a prescription.
- Name and dose, copied from the bottle exactly as it's written
- When it's taken, such as morning, with dinner or at bedtime
- What it's for, in plain words
- Who prescribed it
- Which pharmacy fills it, with the phone number
Add vitamins, supplements and anything taken only as needed. At the top of the page, write any allergies and what the reaction was.
Date the page. Every time something is added, stopped or changed, update it and write the new date.
Page 2: the care team
Every person involved in their care, in one list: primary doctor, each specialist, the pharmacy, the dentist, the eye doctor, and home care if they have it. For each one, write the name, what they handle, the phone number, and where the office is.
Add one more line for the patient portal: which one it is and where the login is kept.
Page 3: the appointment log
This is the page that saves you the most stress, because appointments blur together fast.
- Before: write the questions you want answered, so you don't remember them in the parking lot.
- During: write what was said in the doctor's own words, and any change to medications.
- After: write what happens next, who is doing it, and by when.
Page 4: the essentials
- Full name and date of birth
- Where the insurance cards are kept
- Emergency contacts, in the order to call them
- The hospital they'd want to go to
- Whether there's a health care proxy or power of attorney, who it is, and where the paperwork is
If those last documents don't exist yet, that's a conversation worth having soon, with them and with an attorney.
How to use it
- Bring it to every appointment and hand over the medication list at check-in.
- Keep a copy where a paramedic would find it, like on the refrigerator.
- Take a photo of each page so it's on your phone when you're not home.
- Share it with siblings or anyone else who helps, so the job isn't only yours.
This is an organizing tool, not medical advice. Always follow the care team's instructions, and ask the pharmacist or doctor if anything on the list is unclear.
Start with one page
Tonight, do only the medication list. Line the bottles up on the counter and copy them down. It takes about ten minutes and it's the page you'll be asked for most.
If you'd like these pages already laid out, the HAVEN Planner has medical profiles, a doctors and providers page and an appointment log built in. A notebook works just as well to start.
Caring for someone is a lot to hold. If you're in it right now, tell me what's hardest to keep track of. Message me on Instagram at @bytaylorrada. I read every one. 🤎
